Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight
Y'all, I have been struggling with this a lot lately. I want to know RIGHT NOW what my life is going to be and what the next few years are going to hold. I know that I want to become a child life specialist, and I know that I want to spend my life with Stuart. What I don't know is when, where, and how this will all happen and it is K.I.L.L.I.N.G. me.
I am so type-A. So very type-A. I make lists of everything. I plan everything. In fact, one of my biggest flaws is over-planning. Right now I am really struggling with getting everything in on a time table. I feel like all of these obstacles in my career course keep getting thrown at me and I am not quite sure what to do. I thought I had this all planned out, and yet, maternity leaves and programs hesitant to accept undergrads have my plans all in a tailspin. I don't know where Stuart is going to get a job, and as much as I know that at twenty-two I should have a career focus, that doesn't mean I am not ready to live in the same city as him!
I know God has a plan for me. And despite that, I still find myself stressing out over this entire situation. I want things to be settled down. I want to help people. And the fact that it is going to take me until 2013
almost is freaking me out. I am ready to be an adult, to take care of myself, to stop being a burden on my parents. Fortunately, they have the means to support me and I am so entirely thankful to them for doing that. I know not everyone is spoiled the way I am. But I am ready to be out of school. And I am ready to start the next chapter, wherever that may be. I just need to know when and where that is.
So right now, I am trying to trust in the plan. I am trying to take a deep breath, take things day by day and not over-plan. But I am definitely going to need some prayers to do that. So, if you are the prayin' kind, I would love to make it on your prayer list.
Sorry for the heavy post. It has been laying on my heart lately and since this is my record, I want to be able to look back on this when all is said and done and see how I was feeling.
Happy Tuesday (almost Wednesday) y'all!